Hello,

I was married for 15 years and now have been separated for 4 years. My question is this:  my soon to be ex has had countless relationships that have all failed.I have had none other than a casual date. However, every time my ex ends a relationship she calls and comes over and tells me how unhappy she is and that she misses me and our home.I possess the home. When she is in a relationship she doesn't give me the time of day, in fact she won't even return my calls. I have always maintained our home and my heart for her, but it confuses me so much. She has even stayed the weekend and we slept in separate rooms. I have tried to be respectful and a friend. Please advise.

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-------------------------

My opinion? You make a good case for letting the final divorce decree happen with no trepidation. I know, there's still a type of bond between the two of you -- you didn't end up hating each other -- but an ex who only appreciates you when her current squeeze doesn't work out isn't respectful, nor one that offers more than nostalgia for a home and a husband who is a soft touch -- or, maybe, a tad emotionally weak? I think you should try dating more than the half-baked attempt you've done so far -- or get some counseling as to the reason you haven't, and gain the insight you need to move on, gracefully. Hey, you're a great guy, right? You've got a lot to give the right woman. They are everywhere if you look closely -- and if you don't, and stay stuck in this state of inertia, you have no one to blame but you. Move forward, not back, and get on with living your life.