Dear Miss Emily:

I have had horrible luck with past relationships. Horrible is actually and understatement. I dated a girl for about 2 years, was actually going to marry, and we had planned on having a baby, I was really in love with her and her with me. I was gone for college and she actually ended up finding someone else, started dating, and got pregnant by him when we were still together. I found out via facebook. When I was with her I had the upper-hand, kinda did what I wanted, wore the 'pants' as some would say. After her, I dated another girl but, by then, I had been diagnosed with cancer, and was gone doing treatment a lot. My friends always said she was so wrong for me, and she was. I knew it but I didn't care. She was younger than me and more of a 'bad' girl if you will. While I was gone she was ALWAYS hanging out with guys, and I ALWAYS had my suspicions about her cheating, but she always swore up and down nothing was happening with the guys who she said were more like brothers. After we broke up, turns out she had slept with every single one of those guys, 8 of them mind you, and all behind my back. I concluded she was just a horrible person. Shorty after that ended, I met the perfect woman. We had an instant connection, and we fell in love very, very fast. We have been together for almost a year now, we have plans to get married, and our relationship truly is perfect -- we never fight. I couldn't ask for anything more. I am still sick, and still often gone doing treatment. She has a couple guy friends, and some of them very close to her. We talk 24/7, texting and calling, just always in contact. I am even jealous of her best friend who's a girl. She goes and visits her almost every night at work, but I know for a fact she is going to see her and not some lie to see another guy. But for some reason I cannot shake the "what if?" feeling that there is always something more. I am scared of being played like my ex's have done! I know, deep down, she would never hurt me but I cant help but think of the possibility, and I know it is frustrating for her, as well as it is for me. How can I make this better?

---------------------------------Miss Emily's advice-------------------------

I think you make it better by understanding each of the phases of your life, human nature, and why you made the choices you did during those periods. Learn to take responsibility for those choices, but forgive yourself -- and avoid blaming the other party for making you feel unworthy. It takes two to get away with it! Little is cast in stone in life, and hearts get broken on a daily basis -- but if you've matured and have a better understanding of who you are and what you want from life, you'll be able to trust, again, and put the past behind you. You are exceptionally vulnerable because of your cancer, right now, and it could be easy for you to see the world as a harsh and hostile place if things go south with this woman. But the world is also filled with good people, as well as bad, and it's important to remember that you will attract and maintain good relationships if you believe you can, love who you are, and are smart about your choices.  The relationship you have with this woman  may not last forever, but you don't need to court trouble when, at this point, none exists.