Dear Miss Emily:

I am a 34 year old woman and I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a year.  He is a wonderful, caring, passionate guy.  He has a temper and I have learned if I leave him alone and let it diffuse, normally it will blow over. I do not know what to do with his temper. We have gotten into arguments once a week for 3 weeks.  The latest argument was when he asked me how much I weigh after trying to pick me up.  I didn't want to tell him at that point, since I was insecure about it.  He would not let up and wouldn't let me fall asleep even after I went into the spare bedroom.  So I left the house and he locked the screen door so I couldn't get back in without telling him my weight.  I am not sure what made him stop, but he called me psycho for not telling him and let me in.  He said he couldn't believe I would give up on our relationship over something so stupid.  That I am so insecure. Even this morning, after things cooled off, he is still planning to move out and is still amazed I wouldn't just tell him.  I don't know what to do.  I think he will calm down and we will get past it, but I don't know what I should do in these situations.  I don't always want to give in.  I don't know what to suggest - anger management classes or counseling?  I don't think I am in the wrong, but I still want to fix it. 

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice--------------------------

I think the suggestion of anger management classes would fall on deaf ears, since he was willing to go so far as to punish you for not divulging your weight and, then, blame it on you; as if you had the loose screw.  He's lacking a sensitive chip, and that's not a good sign. That kind of immaturity is ingrained,  and not easily corrected.  He may be "wonderful" but this kind of behavior is offensive and punitive. I'd let him move out.  If you don't show him, now, that this type of behavior is not acceptable, he will continue on as if nothing happened.  Some men never grow up. This may be the case with him. If you're not in the wrong, and I believe that's the case, fixing it would probably mean accepting the status quo.  No, he needs to do some work.  And unless he's willing to do it, that "caring" guy of yours doesn't care enough to let go of something when you ask him to without the dramatics of making you pay the price. You need to realize this as fact.