Hi Miss Emily.   So I've been with this guy for about 3 years, on and off.. I'm 20 yrs old, he's 21. He always lied from the beginning about where he goes, what he's doing, petty little issues that make me argue with him. Me being me, I always give in to his mistakes and run back to him. I've always been there despite all the pain he put me through. Just recently, I found out he slept with another girl. I was so furious, I confronted him about it and he was in denial. I called the girl and she told me everything. They slept together where hes been staying with me! He even brought me to this real nice view spot, come to find out he took her there!! I also found out he talked to her behind my back. So we broke up, and 2 weeks go by.   I changed my number, and he ends up finding out my new number and calls me and gives me his "sorry" and tells me he doesn't know what he was thinking. Then again, I give in.  But this time, I don't know if I can handle it.  I'm  not dependent of him!  I love him too much, and I know,  I love him more then he does me.  Now I'm questioning if I've done the right thing.. Does he really mean hes changed?  Does he really realize what he lost? I'm so confused and still hurt. It's like I wanna stand up on my own and leave, but I can't. I put all my hate aside just because of how I feel for him..Please help!  Thank you!!!

--------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------


You make such a good case for cutting him out of your life.  I don't believe he's changed that quickly, but he can't seem to let go any more than you can gain any self-respect.  He's not in denial, he's just an habitual liar!  My usual answer to this type of letter is this:  Stay until he takes everything he can from you and there's nothing left -- because no matter what I write to you, no matter how sound my advice based of what you have told me, you have taken him back and allowed him to lie to you again, and again.  I think you can do better, but you have to want it and do something about it.  No one can make you look like a needy, foolish 20 year-old unless you allow it.  My final advice:  Don't allow it!