Dear Miss Emily,

I was in a relationship with a man for over a year.  It was almost perfect - we both were unconditionally in love with each other.  Then the trust was broken in our relationship.  It was my fault - he is a very jealous person and he told me not to have any male friends and, one night, I went out with a male co-worker of mine - we just went out to eat and that’s it...but that was like the beginning of the end of our relationship...he no longer trusted me which made me not trust him and arguments arose all the time...2 months ago he broke up with me and said it was because we had too many arguments the last two months of the relationship.  The break-up was very bad.  He told me that he no longer loved me and that he can no longer see me as his wife.  He said I need to move on with another man, and he wants to be friends but would never cross that boundary with me again...well, since we broke up I NEVER initiated contact with him - I answer his calls sometimes and keep it friendly. But the past month, he has been calling every 2 or 3 days and I actually seen him 3 times now.  Every time we are together he can't stop using the word "babe" and it’s as if we are really back together, but when things get too good he always says, "oh, we are just friends"...it’s like he talks himself out of being with me again - he is scared or confused?  If I talk about a relationship he just says "We are just friends" but when he calls and we are together we are TOGETHER....I really love him out of the bottom of my heart, and I want to be with him but I don't know what to do...I hurt him real bad and I apologized already and I feel like I am just waiting for him to come around.  Is there anything I can do to bring him back without being desperate?

-----------------------Miss Emily’s advice---------------------

You say you and he loved each other unconditionally?  Well, maybe you did, but he had one big condition: No male friends.  If some man told me that, I’d laugh in his face, and follow it with “Are you joking?” Having a male friend does not necessary translate into having sex with him, and he should know that – if he trusted you.  I’m sorry, but you already seem desperate – and that’s because you think you did something wrong, and profusely apologize for this perceived infraction.  I see this man as extremely insecure, or he’s caught in a time-warp.  I think you should thank him for breaking-up with you, because you were spared being married to a man who doesn’t appear to be emotionally stable and trust would always be an issue.  God forbid you were to chat-up the butcher at the local market and get caught!  No, I can’t suggest you do anything to bring him back, now or ever.  Is he scared or confused?  Who cares?  But I can tell you he's not worthy of you.  I hope you come to realize it.