Dear Miss Emily:

This man was interested in me (he's quiet, shy, reserved, doesn't talk a lot, he is also a loner, doesn't have a big social life and likes to spend a lot of time on his own). Finally, he asked me out and we had a lovely few weeks dating, then I feel I may have come on too strong, and I  feel that he has lost interest. (He made it clear that he didn't want a relationship and that he was happy being single). Now he never calls or contacts me, however, I call him maybe every week, or every two weeks to catch up, and when we do catch up it's really lovely.  I still feel we have a lovely connection (so our first date was 2 1/2 months ago).  He doesn't seem like a player at all, but he doesn't like to communicate, so I am trying to work out what is going on and whether it is pointless me keeping in contact. I want to take things easy and slowly and, to be honest, I just want the company, but I am worried that he thinks I want more (like a relationship which I don't). How do I communicate this to him? I want to send him an email as he's not a talker.  Is it wrong to send a man an email expressing what you want and how you feel?

------------------Miss Emily's advice----------------

You described a man who sounds like he has the personality of the Unabomber!  Sorry, bad joke.  The Unabomber didn't date.  Maybe you did come on too strong, but too strong to this guy is anyone who seems to enjoy his company.  No, don't e-mail him.  It's not worth your effort and the damage to your self-respect. He's already proved he's not functioning on the same level as you, and e-mailing him to try to convince him you are is a waste of your time.  No longer call him by phone, either.  He's only being polite, and you don't want to force him into a strained, dare I mention the word, relationship.