Dear Miss Emily:

Hope all is well.  I am 21 yrs old and I live in Miami.  Lately, I’ve been into older guys around the 30 or late 20's. There is this guy I met who is super cool, but I could tell he only wanted one thing "SEX." Well, anyway, I kept talking to him, and after almost 2 weeks after meeting, I finally went out with him on Valentine’s Day.  We talked. I mean, he noticed that I was not the type to play around with, and that is not the type of relationship I would want. Basically, I let him know I don't do the casual SEX – you either know what you want or don't. To me, it’s fine if that is all he wants, but it wouldn’t be with me. We where cool, and I left because I had a dinner to attend.  He never called or text me back after that. But out the blue, a month later, he text me to do something with some of his friends. I said that was cool because I was like, Ok, we can be friends.  So I went, but I felt like he was just changing his strategy game with me.  Correct me if I am wrong, but I think he is cute and the little that I know, I like.  I don't want to stress this, but I know that he will be the type to call me once in a blue moon.  I feel that I can keep on talking to him as a friend when he calls.  I can go out with him if I want.  Do you think with time it could change? Or should I let it be just the way it is, meaning, I go out with him with friends just to have FUN, as a friend and nothing more.  I mean, it’s obvious he is not that INTO ME.  Do you think he views me as a friend, because I get mixed signals.
-------------------------Miss Emily’s advice--------------------

If you mean, by saying, "Do you think things will change?” he’ll decide he wants a relationship on your dating terms, I can’t say.  I wouldn’t completely rule it out.  You suspect he has a new strategy game.  I guess that would mean if he approaches you as a friend first, he can get you to change your mind about having sex?  I somewhat doubt it because, if that were the case, I don’t think he would have taken so long to call you back – before this new “friendship” relationship started.  Yes, I think he views you as a friend.  But if there’s even the remotest chance that he thinks he can break you on the sex issue, it’s a real shame on his part, because I am sure you were convincing on Valentine’s Day and will continue to do so if the subject comes up. If you enjoy his company on a friendship level, keep seeing him.  However, if you think that you are really “into him” and there is going to be a series of frustrating times hanging out together, don’t encourage the friendship.