Dear Miss Emily:

Around 10 years ago, I fell in love with this girl in school.  I was always to shy to ask her out, then I had to leave the country.  I lost contact with all my friends and worst of all, her. For five years, I've been thinking about her and I can't get her out of my head. One month ago, I found her on Facebook, and I'm now in contact with her again. She was very happy to see me again on MSN and, two weeks ago, I finally mustered the courage tell her how much I love her, that I've loved her all this time and how bad I'm hurting.  She was very honest with me, she said that this summer (in her gap year) she is going to France for 6 months to work, then she was going to travel around Europe for a couple months but, now, she has decided to come and stay with me for those 2 months. This made me extremely happy. She told me that she knows that she could love me and that when she tells me this she wants it to be real, from her heart, and when she knows she can be there for me. She says that she doesn't want to get into a long distance relationship because she can't.  She wants to give "us" a chance at it for when she comes to me. She also said that when she comes to me, something will definitely happen between us.  This made me very happy.  She then said that, until then, she is going to continue living her life. Recently she told me that she met a guy and that it could be serious.  This shattered me, even though she told me that she's going to continue living her life. Nothing has really changed about how we talk to each other, but I feel pretty hopeless.  I think about her all the time. I need her so very bad. I just want to be with her, hold her tight and hold her hand. I'm going crazy and I don't know what to do. I'm very confused right now.
Do you have any advice for me? Do you think I have a chance with her?

-----------------Miss Emily's advice------------

Yes, I have some advice. You need to start thinking rationally because, now, you are not.  The circumstances you have described are odd, at best.  You have spoken to her for only a month, and now you have these elaborate plans?  If I am reading your letter correctly, she won't be landing at your doorstep until, when -- December or January?  A lot can change by then, and you are right to worry.  You know I read your letter many, many, times, and I got a nagging feeling that this whole story is a fantasy concocted by two extremely naive human beings. I'm not trying to make fun of you, believe me.  I only think that you are handling this in the wrong way.  If you think there is a chance for something to happen, then you should make every effort to see her in person way before the time she has given you to launch this romance. So far, she is calling all the shots.  Where is your input on how this should play out?  The gentlemen that she's now seeing could lead to something serious but, don't worry, she still intends to live her life?  How very madcap and free-spirited of her.  No wonder you feel hopeless.  I can't say, for sure, but the signs ahead have ?????? written all over it.  But if waiting 10 months in hopes that this comes to fruition, go ahead with her plan.  But be prepared for this dream to possibly turn into a nightmare unless you take the bull by the horns and bring this odd circumstance to a satisfactory place. If you don't, you could end up feeling victimized -- despite the role you played in this story.