Dear Miss Emily:

I met this guy about a month-and-a-half ago, and we hit it off really well. We've been dating for about two weeks now, when he recently told me that he needed to talk to me. He had been in a relationship with his ex-girlfriend for about 2 ½ years, and he broke up with her about 4 months ago. He told me that he had promised himself that he would stay low for a while and not get involved with anything, but then he met me and I changed everything. He says he really likes me, but he's not sure if he's ready, or if he should start a serious relationship. Personally, I don’t want to rush into anything serious, either, but I really do like him. He asked me for advice because he says he is frustrated and doesn't know what to do. I don't really know what to do or say to make the situation better. Should I just give him some space and let him think things through? Any ideas? Thank you for your help!

-----------------------Miss Emily’s advice-------------------

I have to commend him for his honesty, although it’s a weak approach by asking you to participate in his decision to go forward or “stay low.”  You should not have to be put in a position to plead your case if he’s having second thoughts.  You may say you are not interested in something serious but, when emotions take over, this earnest intention is soon forgotten.  That alone is the reason to back-off when someone tells you they "don't know what to do."  The truth is, he thinks he wants to be a free-agent, right now.  Give him the space he needs, and if he decides to re-enter the relationship at a later date, it will depend on your availability at that time.  But it will  happen for the right reasons, and not some lack of courage to follow that inner-voice.