Dear Miss Emily:

I am a, just turned, 31 year old newlywed and mother of one son, who is planning to have two more kids with the sweetest guy in the world.  Here is my problem, as silly as it might sound:  Although I am not heavy, my figure flares and is a little wide at the hips.  I have sort of a JLo or Beyonce butt if that helps.  For as long as we've been together, my husband has had a soft spot for poking, and prodding me in the rump/hip/upper thigh area.  He will often tell me how lucky he is to have a woman with boobs AND an ass, and describe me as "one hot babe".  My problem is that my ex used to call me wide ride and fat ass when he touched me back there, and I got to where I just did not like to be touched there.  I find that I am still a little self-conscious when being touched in that area.  I feel like this is my problem and not his, and that I should say nothing because he has a right to touch me anywhere he wants.  Still, how do I get over these feelings?  Again, I know this sounds stupid of me.

-------------------------Miss Emily’s advice-----------------------

Dear Touchy:

It does not sound stupid, and you are wrong to think your husband has a right to touch you anywhere he wants.  Does that mean he can play with your tonsils?  Seriously, if anyone poked and prodded me like that, I’d go ballistic, no matter how well meaning.  I'm sure he does not realize this, but I think your husband’s behavior is demeaning to you as a woman. Really, if he wants to poke and prod meat, he should get a job at a slaughter house!  Tell him how you feel and stop thinking you have to get over these feelings. In time, you might, but that's not the point.  If he thinks you are being silly, and dismisses your request, the “sweetest guy in the world” has a sour spot and he needs a lesson in sensitivity.  By the way, a “bubble butt” will work in your favor as you age. You will be able to look at all the women with deflating butts that cannot resist the force of gravity, and feel sorry for them. You will be forever grateful for the genes you were given, because you will still look good in your jeans!