Dear Miss Emily:

My girlfriend and I have been off and on since about 7 months ago. About 3 months back, we had a huge falling out and I just recently started talking to her again. It was all fine until yesterday, when she told me that she was going to call me back and she never did. Now with some people you know that’s just how they are, but not with her. The only time she doesn't call back is if she’s mad or upset. So I then went crazy and called her phone so many times I lost count. She never answered, so the next day I went over to her house and her dad came outside and started cussing me out and told me to never talk to his daughter again.  But the thing is that she loves me, and I love her. She is somewhat mad at me but its nothing that we couldn't work through. So our only problem would be her dad. What should I do?  I know that this is the girl I want to spend my life with, but I don't want to start any trouble.
Parent Trapped

---------------------Miss Emily’s advice-------------------

Dear Parent Trapped:

I would think that if this girl is in total disagreement with her dad, she’d find some way to contact you – unless she lives in fear of him.  I see that you two are young enough where parent intervention holds a lot of sway.  This relationship has had a lot of trouble, it would seem, and her dad has been privy to it.  I think he perceives you as a controlling drama king, and he’s fed up with the situation.  You need to get straight with why you two had your falling out periods.  What motivates you to disagree and fight, and what could you have done differently?  It’s premature for you to think this is the girl you want to spend the rest of your life with, because it’s rare, at your age, to find and follow through on making that person your life’s mate. You’re off to a lousy start, anyway!  Back off, and get some perspective. You’ll never win this battle if you don’t get in touch with why this girl’s dad sees you as a pariah.  You'll make a mistake if you let your fragile ego be your guide.  Time and wisdom are the only things that can help you through this sticky situation, because making a pest of yourself will only serve to perpetuate ill feelings toward you, and you can’t afford any more negatives.