Dear Miss Emily:
 
OK, so I went out with this guy for 3 months. He was the one to break up with me over text. Two months after the break up, he text me and we started talking again and hanging out.  My cousin has told me that he likes a girl, but she has a boyfriend.  He has led me on so many times, and every time we hangout, we end up making out. When I discuss it, he tells me he doesn’t know what he wants and he doesn’t want to commit to anything.  When we first started talking again, he was sweet and would bring up old memories we had. after the first time we hung out.  He hasn’t been too nice. He doesn’t communicate with me, well, and he gets mad at me very easily when there’s no need to get angry. My guy friend says that it’s possible that he’s doing all this because he knows I’ll always be there when he wants me, and that I’m like a second choice when he can't get a girl he wants.  It’s so hard to move on, because I still care. But I need to give up. He’s not the guy I used to know and that makes me sad.  But the real question would be why would he act weird and stop talking to me after the last time we hung out? I’ll explain: It’s been about a week since we last hung out, and he asked me to come out to his house and we would chill, and maybe go to the football game later that night.. I got there, and we were alone. We ended up having sex.  It was our first time. We were both virgins. Since that day he hardly answers me, and when I ask him why he doesn’t talk to me anymore, he won't respond. I asked him if he doesn’t like talking to me anymore, and he said he does, but he didn’t know we had to talk every minute.  I thought that was rude, and we haven’t talked in 3 days; which is weird since we usually talk everyday.  I really think he used me and now he’s probably with another chick.  I just can't believe he’d do that to me. I didn’t think he was like that.  I’m confused.
Betrayed

-----------------------Miss Emily’s advice-----------------

Dear Betrayed:

Wow, have you handled this all wrong!  Here’s a guy who broke-up with you through a text, and you repaid him by throwing yourself at him like a hurricane.  Anything wrong with this picture?  He knows you are an easy mark.  I’m not saying that you are a loser, it’s just that your guy friend is right. You’re available when his real choice is not.  He probably feels he’s in too deep, now, after you and he have had sex – which I might add, was a stupid thing to do. Any self-respecting human being, in the 21st century, doesn’t think they can win the affection of another by having sex with the one who treated them like an afterthought.  I suspect you both are pretty young, and I’m going to cut him some slack because he, too, is learning, and he’s going to make some mistakes, as well.  But if I were you, I’d take a look in the mirror, and if what you see is a silly person who deserves to be jerked around, continue to play the part of a puppy who follows its owner.  But if you see someone who needs to start conducting their life with respect and dignity, I think you’ll figure out that you have made a complete error in judgment and move forward with the resolve that, next time, the real best friend -- you know, the one who will guide you in life, is you, you and YOU!