Dear Miss Emily:

I am dating a wonderful girl, but the problem is that she is my best friend's ex. He does not know that I have been seeing her for a month, now, and it is going great with her. Should I tell him or just see if he finds out? I would hate to loose him as a friend, but she is amazing. Please help. THANK YOU!
New Girlfriend Problem

----------------------------Miss Emily's advice-----------------------


Dear G P:

I would bet the farm on you knowing what my answer will be, but let's pretend you don't.  If your friend is going to be angry about your dating his ex,  it will happen whenever he finds out. However, finding out from some other source, rather than you, adds salt to any perceived wound. Trust is the purest element in any relationship. Sit him down, and tell him the truth. You don’t need to go into the details of how it happened; nor should you be defensive. If he goes ballistic, that says something about him – it’s a pride issue, and he’ll just have to get over it, or make the decision to let your friendship fall away. Since you weren’t seeing her behind his back while they were together (I assume), let the guilt issue cease like the last frame of The Sopranos. Honesty is a character builder, and extremely liberating. Tell him today!