Dear Miss Emily:

 I'm engaged to someone whom I thought I loved. He has been very mean to me and has gotten to the point of hitting me. We just moved in together about a month ago to MY new home and that's when everything started. He keeps on telling me that he will change and that he will never be mean to me. I don't believe him. Do you think that he could change, or should I just move on?

---------------------Miss Emily’s advice-----------------

Dear Wounded:

No, I don’t think he will change.  If you look at the pattern of abusers, it is common, a first, to apologize and say that they will change (this is typical of the aloholic/addict, as well), but it only gets progressively worse.  Next, they start blaming the person they abuse. Many women have died because they did not get out, early, from an abusive relationship.  My suggestion is to break it off, immediately, and get support from friends and family.  If it is your new home, he must leave.  I don’t know how you got into this situation, but please don’t blame yourself.  Many women have been “believers.”  It is human nature to want to trust.  But you have found yourself in a situation where you can no longer trust this man.  Please explore the web on this subject. Type in:  Domestic violence and abuse.  Here is a paragraph I took from one site: Despite what many people believe, domestic violence is not due to the abuser’s loss of control over his behavior. In fact, violence is a deliberate choice made by the abuser in order to take control over his wife or partner.