Dear Miss Emily:

I have recently gone through a very bizarre break up. In short, my boyfriend of almost a year broke up with me the minute I met him up for a vacation with a bunch of our friends. He then had drunken sex with this girl he has known for years, less than 24 hours later while I was upstairs sleeping. To make things worse, it was her house we were staying in. Now, since we have the same friends, I don't know whether or not I should be friends with him. Our relationship was nothing special and we were both happy to end it, but the way things ended was horrible. I don't want to alienate our friends by making them feel like they need to pick sides, but I just can't get over what he did. And now I have rumors coming to me that he was cheating during our relationship. He insists that he did not, but that is a given. And just to make things a little worse, we confide in each other the most. So I guess this was not the short version, but I do not know what to do or who to believe. We both still care a lot about each other...but I feel disillusioned and like my life has turned surreal. These things just don't happen to me! I would greatly appreciate an unbiased opinion.

---------------------------Miss Emily’s advice-----------------------

Dear Bruised:

If you were able to sleep after breaking-up with this Casanova, that’s a telling sign. But I think you feel rejection, and that’s pretty normal because it inflicts damage to the ego.  However, you must put this in perspective. The rumors are probably true.  He wasn’t to be trusted from the get-go.  If your relationship with him was “nothing special,” then don’t pretend that you care a lot about each other.  Time is a great healer for those who move on down the road with self-confidence, despite its many obstacles. For some of us, the definition of friendship becomes clearer as we move closer to our final destination. This being a sad reality of human nature, you can buck the odds by, now, redefining what friendship really means and act accordingly.  No one else need be involved if you take the high road.  My final opinion:  This guy's an ass.