Hello Emily,

I am having a bit of a problem, and I am hoping that you can help me. I am a 20 years old female.  I have been dating this guy who is two years older than me. We had been fighting a lot and, in the end, we decided to break up. It has been two months now since we broke up, and he claims that he still loves me and wants to spend his life with me. We agreed to take it slow, and see if we could work something out. The problem is though, that he does not contact me at all anymore. He never calls and never writes to me. We only talk when I write to him and he replies. It has been two weeks now and he still hasn't contacted me. I don't know what is going on, or what I should do. I don't feel like contacting him, again, because he treats me like a stranger. I feel as if I am the only one who wants to work this out, even though he claims that he loves me. What should I do? Is he tired of me? Should I leave him alone?

-------------------------------Miss Emily's advice------------------------

You didn't mention that you see him in person. I say that because I get many letters from advice seekers who carry on cyber relationships (call it dating), but I am usually dubious of their success for what, I feel, are obvious reasons. Whether this is the case, or not, I think you should leave him alone, and that would mean leaving him! A guy who tells you he loves you, and wants a life with you, and then ignores you, has a screw loose, or his definition of love is different than yours and mine. Do not be taken in by his talk of love. His actions, in no way, speak to it, and the fact you have to be the initiator is insulting, and demeaning to you. I believe you're asking for tremendous emotional pain down the line if you continue down this path. And it's certainly possible he's met someone else.  With 7 billion people in the world, there is someone out there for you, and this man is but a speak of dust in the wind. You fought with him, and it led to a break-up. That tells me there were control issues, and/or a lack of common interests and values. Move on, and consider yourself better off.