Dear Emily,

My boyfriend and I met online. He's 30 and works in the oil field. I'm 21 and a university student part time, and also have a full time job. When we met things were great we hit it off right away. We had great chemistry and after about 2 weeks of knowing each other and going on dates every night we made it official. We have always been very good at communication. Even when there were issues we more so just bickered into the issue was resolved. I really like him. I've never really liked any guy this much. In my past relationships I've always been distant and didn't care much. And according to some of his friends he never bothered with girls before and they've mentioned how shocked they are about how into me he is. However, when we met he was on his time off (he works 6 months out of the year and takes 6 off). He is now back at work, and things have been really rocky. When he first left things were okay. He remained the same sweet boyfriend I know and love. But lately he seems distant. Throughout the day we text back and forth and everything, but at night it's a different story. We don't just bicker, we yell and scream. There seems to be no solution. I know I've been pushy, always wanting some attention, but it's hard for me to cope with him being gone. And then there's trust issues I can't bring myself to trust him. I don't know if this is normal for girls that have boyfriends out of town or, more specifically, working in the oil industry. He tells me it's because he's tired. Recently he got promoted to a foreman position so he works 13 hours a day and doesn't get days off for at least 2 weeks. But I don't know if I should believe it. Maybe it's me? When he comes home for his days off it's like things are back to being perfect. We spend as much time together as possible and try not to argue because we know we only have so little time but when he goes back it all starts again. He's told me many times that he likes me a lot and has even spoken about our future together (which from my understanding he's never done before). Coming to realize what I thought was perfect isn't really that way and it's hard. I'm just confused as to whether or not I should keep this going, or if it's even worth holding on to.

------------------------------Miss Emily's advice---------------------

This guy has an odd job. Any woman who gets involved with him has to understand that. You cannot be frustrated when he's gone and end up yelling and bickering with each other because he's not there, and you can't communicate face-to-face, nor have certain types of intimacy. It seems the outbreaks are out of frustration on your part. Long-distance relationships are hard. There are no two ways about it. An incredible amount of patience and understanding have to go into it to make it work. I do believe that his job does require 13 hour days. I suspect any job that allows 6 months off requires blood, sweat and tears the time you're on. A relationship like this has to have a strong ability to trust. Now, I'm not saying that he won't go out for a beer or two with the guys after a long day in the fields, but if you know him to be a good guy, I doubt he's trolling like a horn-dog. I am sure he's pretty tired at the end of the day, as well. Bottom line? This is his job, you agreed to get involved with him knowing what's demanded of him, and you're going to lose him if you continue down this path.