Dear Miss Emily:

I have been dating a guy for about 3 months now. He is a great catch for most girls- well educated, financially independent, decent looking, and very loving. He has already told me he loves me and wants to get married and also start a family with me. He is in his late 20's and I am already 30 years old. I know he is crazy in love with me and I also tell him I love him. I do care for him a lot, but I am always still looking for something better and also my religion (we are not the same race/religion). This is going to sound very shallow, but I like going for men extremely tall..and he is 5'11. I am trying to overlook this, and I try to tell myself that I can't be too picky with men, or I will end up alone. so what should I do -- suck it up and learn to love him, or dump him and look elsewhere?

----------------------------Miss Emily's advice--------------------------

Stop telling yourself you're too picky. There are certain criteria you want in a man. I can see a modest readjustment in your thinking if you have superficial desires, but you've been with this man three months and you're not truly feeling the love. It's better to be alone than lonely in a relationship, and that's what you'll be if you settle for this man. You can't force yourself to love someone. It has to come naturally -- a mutual feeling between two people -- not just one. You'll end up resenting him, and that's not fair if you've led him to believe you love him as much as he thinks he loves you. Personally, I feel he's moved too quickly into thinking marriage and children after only three months together. He has his head in the clouds, and he should be more circumspect before he makes a quantum leap into "forever." Ultimately, it's just not fair to him to lead him on and, of course, you'll end up miserable. He may be a catch for someone, but not for you.