Dear Miss Emily:

Hi. I have been in a long distance relationship for two years. We see each other on average every two months. The relationship has been rocky because we both have wants and needs and are unable to achieve them because of the distance. Aside from that, there are times when we are unable to communicate and understand each other.  I feel like the long distance is not allowing us to get to know each other on the same level as most relationships.  I am currently a senior in college and I have decided to spend my last spring break with my friends in school instead of going to see him. I spent last spring break with him and do not go on trips with my friends often. We plan on living with each other after I finish school, so I figured that my last spring break with my friends will be okay. He does not hang out with my friends because of the distance so I did not invite him. He is very upset about this entire situation to the point that he is unsure that he wants to be with me. Am I being unfair? Am I in the wrong?


------------------------------Miss Emily’s advice-----------------------

I don’t see this as being a right or wrong issue.  I’m stumped as to why you would plan on living with him after you finish college, because despite the fact that you don’t spend much time together, you really don’t seem to cherish the time you do spend together!  As well, you didn't invite him for Spring break for a reason.  Maybe you resent having to give up your free time to see and visit him without his giving an equal share of effort.  Is he is calling the shots – sort of like a parent might , and you are, now, the rebellious child?  Do what you feel is right for you, and if he says he is unsure that he wants to live with you, tell him that  you, too, are unsure.  It seems to me that you want this last bit of freedom and want the "last hurrah" before settling into what – prison?  Face this issue, now, and stand up for what you feel you want to do and follow through.  What do you have to lose, a security blanket?  If that’s the case, it time to cut “blankie” free.