Dear Miss Emily:

A couple months ago, this boy had a crush on me  but I didn’t really try to take it to the next level with him. Now we are best friends, and I’m starting to fall for him – but I don’t think he likes me in that way anymore. I’m not sure if he truly wants to be just friends or he’s trying to make me jealous (so I will start to like him) by mentioning other girls.  Still, deep inside, I think he might be hiding that he wants to be more than just friends.  I can see signs that he might still like me in the way he acts around me compared to other people, but I don’t think he wants to admit that he still likes me.  What should I do?
Need A Crystal Ball

--------------------------------Miss Emily’s advice---------------------------

Dear Need:

The problem with this kind of relationship, and all relationships that don’t move forward is (and this is an old, often beaten to death, response): Lack of communication!  You can wait a long time for the body language to transfer to words spoken, but it might just stay in  limbo if you, or he is not willing to verbalize the intentions in this “friendship.”  If you want to continue to try and read his mind, good luck on that score.  Most people are pretty poor mind readers, in that they really just see things from their own perspective, leaving the truth to twist in the wind.  So this is what I would do if you have the guts.  Tell him that you not only see him as a great friend, but you now have "other" feelings for him.  Point blank ask him: “How do you feel about that?”  Hopefully, he will respond honesty.  Any reply short of a yes or no, means he’s incapable of being completely honest about this.  If he says he’s not sure about his feelings, but wants to remain friends, it’s up to you if you care to keep the status quo.  Bottom line:  He may be shy in areas of romance, afraid of rejection, or outright scared and, if so, at least you have stated your intentions and are free to make decisions on what you know, rather than guessing.  Confront this before you start losing sleep and your homework suffers.  You have absolutely nothing to lose, but you will gain something that courage often drags with it. . .  self-respect.